Steve Pavlina：如何花20分钟找到人生目标

文章 高亮观点 ：如果你想发现自己生命中真正的目标，当务之急先清空你的头脑，摒弃所有被灌输的错误理念（包括你可能毫无目标的想法）。 不断地在纸上写下答案，直到你发现某个答案让你感动到落泪。这就是你的人生目标。

如何找到自己真正的人生目标？我指的不是你的工作、日常职责，甚至不是你的长期目标。我说的是你存在于世的真正原因——你存在的根本缘由。或许你自认为是个虚无主义者，不认为人生有特定的目标或意义。没关系，怀疑自己有目标并不妨碍你去发现它，正如不相信重力的存在，并不会让你免于跌倒一样。

不相信只会让这个过程变得更长，如果你是这样的人，不妨将这篇博文标题中的数字20改为40（如果你真的很固执，就改为60）。但更有可能的是，如果你不相信自己有目标，那你可能也不会相信我说的话。即便如此，花20分钟去尝试一下又有什么风险呢？让我们通过一个关于李小龙的故事来开启今天的练习。

一位武术大师向李小龙求教，希望他能传授所有关于武术的精髓。李小龙举起了两只盛满液体的杯子，说道：“这第一只杯子象征着你目前对武术的全部理解。而这第二只杯子则代表了我对武术的全面认识。如果你想用我的知识填满你的杯子，你必须先把你杯子里的知识倒空。

” 如果你想发现自己生命中真正的目标，当务之急先清空你的头脑，摒弃所有被灌输的错误理念（包括你可能毫无目标的想法）。那么如何发现你的人生目标呢？尽管有很多方法可以做到这一点，但其中一些颇为复杂， 在此给大家提供一个简单易行的方法，任何人都可以做到。

你对这个过程的态度越是开放，对结果的期待越是积极，你得到答案的速度就越快。

然而，即便你对此心存疑虑，认为这是一场愚蠢且无意义的时间浪费，但只要你持之以恒，这个过程依然有效——只不过可能需要更长的时间来达到目标。你要做的事情如下：1 拿出一张白纸或打开一个备忘录app，你可以在上面打字（我更喜欢后者，因为它更快）。

3 写下任何跳入你脑海的答案。它不必是一个完整的句子，简短的短语也可以。4 重复步骤3，不断地写下答案，直到你发现某个答案让你感动到落泪。这就是你的目标。就是这样。不管你是咨询师、工程师还是健美运动员，都没关系。对有些人来说，这个练习非常有意义；

而对另一些人来说，这么做似乎是愚蠢的。通常，你需要15-20分钟才来清除头脑中的杂念和你对这个社会的刻板印象。错误的答案会来自你固有的观念和经历。但当真正的答案出现时，你会感到思路开阔，豁然开朗，仿佛它来源于一个更高层次的地方。对于那些固步自封、觉知度低的人来说，要摒弃所有错误的人生答案，可能需要较长的时间，甚至可能超过一个小时。

但如果你坚持下去，在写下100个、200个，甚至可能500个答案后，你会被那个让你情感澎湃、让你醍醐灌顶的答案所震撼。如果你从未尝试过这种方法，它可能听起来有些荒谬。即便如此，不妨将其视为一种尝试，尽管去做吧。在这个过程中，你的一些答案会非常相似。

你甚至可能会重复之前的答案。然后你可能会转向一个新的切入点，围绕另一个主题再生成10-20个答案。这都没关系，只要你脑海中蹦出任何答案，你就可以写下来，只要你继续写下去就行。在这个过程中的某个时刻（通常在写下50-100个答案之后），你可能会想要放弃，感觉无法看到答案的收敛。

你可能会有想要起身找个借口去做别的事情的强烈的冲动。这是正常的，要克服这种抗拒，继续写下去。这种抗拒的感觉最终会消失。在探索过程中，你可能会碰到一些答案，它们能激起你内心的一丝波动，但又不至于让你感动落泪——这些答案感觉上总是差那么一点。

当你写下这些答案时，不妨将这些答案标记出来，以便稍后再回过头来根据它们生成新的变体。每个答案都是你人生目标的一块拼图，单独看它们并不完整。当你开始得到这类答案时，就意味着你已经越来越接近了。继续努力。独自进行这项活动，确保不受任何干扰，这一点至关重要。

如果你是一个虚无主义者，那么可以从“我没有目标”或“生命毫无意义”这样的答案开始，然后继续下去。如果你坚持下去，最终还是会收敛到你的答案。当我做这个练习时，我花了大约25分钟，在第106步时得到了最终答案。在第17、39和53步时，部分答案（小高潮）开始出现了，在第55-60步左右，我感受到了抗拒（想要起身去做别的事情，预期这个过程会失败，感到非常不耐烦，甚至有点恼火）。

在第80步，我花了2分钟时间闭上眼睛，放松，清空思绪，专注于让答案出现在脑海中——这很有帮助，因为在这次休息之后，我得到的答案开始变得更加清晰。然后在第100-106步，大部分答案得到了收敛，并形成了最终的答案。我得出的最终答案是：要活得清醒而勇敢，要与爱和同情心产生共鸣，要激发他人内在的伟大精神，并以平和的方式离开这个世界。

当你找到了自己对“你为什么来到这里”这个问题的独特答案时，你会感到它与你内心产生了深深的共鸣。这些文字对你来说似乎有一种特殊的能量，每当你阅读它们时，你都会感受到那种能量。找到你的人生目标是容易的，困难的是每天都牢记这个目标，并努力提升自己，直到你成为理想中的自己。

如果你好奇这个小方法为何奏效，我建议先把这个问题放在一边，直到你成功完成整个过程。一旦完成，你或许能自己悟出它之所以有效的原因。如果你问10位通过这个过程找到答案的人它为什么它有效，你很可能会得到10个不同的答案，每个答案都通过他们个人的信仰系统过滤，并且每个答案都包含了真理的理解。

如果你在答案收敛之前就放弃了，这个过程就不会奏效。我估计80-90%的人可以在不到一个小时的时间内实现收敛。如果你真的根深蒂固于自己的信念，对这个过程抗拒，也许你需要5次尝试、3个小时才能完成，但我怀疑这样的人要么会很早就放弃（比如在最初的15分钟内），要么根本就不会尝试。

但如果你被吸引来阅读这篇文章，那么你不太可能属于这一类人。不妨试一试吧！无非只有两个可能：你要么找到生命中真正的目标，要么仅仅损失掉这20分钟。How to Discover Your Life Purpose in About 20 Minutes January 16,

2005 How do you discover your real purpose in life?I’m not talking about your job,your daily responsibilities,or even your long-term goals. I mean the real reason why you’re here at all — the very reason you exist. Perhaps you’re a rather nihilistic person who doesn’t believe you have a purpose and that life has no meaning. Doesn’t matter. Not believing that you have a purpose won’t prevent you from discovering it,

just as a lack of belief in gravity won’t prevent you from tripping. All that a lack of belief will do is make it take longer,

so if you’re one of those people,just change the number 20 in the title of this blog entry to 40 (or 60 if you’re really stubborn). Most likely though if you don’t believe you have a purpose,

then you probably won’t believe what I’m saying anyway,but even so,what’s the risk of investing an hour just in case?Here’s a story about Bruce Lee which sets the stage for this little exercise. A master martial artist asked Bruce to teach him everything Bruce knew about martial arts. Bruce held up two cups,

both filled with liquid. “The first cup,” said Bruce,“represents all of your knowledge about martial arts. The second cup represents all of my knowledge about martial arts. If you want to fill your cup with my knowledge,

you must first empty your cup of your knowledge.” If you want to discover your true purpose in life,you must first empty your mind of all the false purposes you’ve been taught (including the idea that you may have no purpose at all). So how to discover your purpose in life?

While there are many ways to do this,some of them fairly involved,here is one of the simplest that anyone can do. The more open you are to this process,

and the more you expect it to work,the faster it will work for you. But not being open to it or having doubts about it or thinking it’s an entirely idiotic and meaningless waste of time won’t prevent it from working as long as you stick with it — again,

it will just take longer to converge. Here’s what to do:Take out a blank sheet of paper or open up a word processor where you can type (I prefer the latter because it’s faster). Write at the top,

“What is my true purpose in life?” Write an answer (any answer) that pops into your head. It doesn’t have to be a complete sentence. A short phrase is fine. Repeat step 3 until you write the answer that makes you cry. This is your purpose. That’s it. It doesn’t matter if you’re a counselor or an engineer or a bodybuilder. To some people this exercise will make perfect sense. To others it will seem utterly stupid. Usually it takes 15-20 minutes to clear your head of all the clutter and the social conditioning about what you think your purpose in life is. The false answers will come from your mind and your memories. But when the true answer finally arrives,

it will feel like it’s coming to you from a different source entirely. For those who are very entrenched in low-awareness living,

it will take a lot longer to get all the false answers out,possibly more than an hour. But if you persist,after 100 or 200 or maybe even 500 answers,

you’ll be struck by the answer that causes you to surge with emotion,the answer that breaks you. If you’ve never done this,

it may very well sound silly to you. So let it seem silly,and do it anyway. As you go through this process,some of your answers will be very similar. You may even re-list previous answers. Then you might head off on a new tangent and generate 10-20 more answers along some other theme. And that’s fine. You can list whatever answer pops into your head as long as you just keep writing. At some point during the process (typically after about 50-100 answers),

you may want to quit and just can’t see it converging. You may feel the urge to get up and make an excuse to do something else. That’s normal. Push past this resistance,

and just keep writing. The feeling of resistance will eventually pass. You may also discover a few answers that seem to give you a mini-surge of emotion,

but they don’t quite make you cry — they’re just a bit off. Highlight those answers as you go along,so you can come back to them to generate new permutations. Each reflects a piece of your purpose,

but individually they aren’t complete. When you start getting these kinds of answers,it just means you’re getting warm. Keep going. It’s important to do this alone and with no interruptions. If you’re a nihilist,

then feel free to start with the answer,“I don’t have a purpose,” or “Life is meaningless,” and take it from there. If you keep at it,

you’ll still eventually converge. When I did this exercise,it took me about 25 minutes,and I reached my final answer at step 106. Partial pieces of the answer (mini-surges) appeared at steps 17,

39,and 53,and then the bulk of it fell into place and was refined through steps 100-106. I felt the feeling of resistance (wanting to get up and do something else,

expecting the process to fail,feeling very impatient and even irritated) around steps 55-60. At step 80 I took a 2-minute break to close my eyes,

relax,clear my mind,and to focus on the intention for the answer to come to me — this was helpful as the answers I received after this break began to have greater clarity. Here was my final answer:

to live consciously and courageously,to resonate with love and compassion,to awaken the great spirits within others,and to leave this world in peace. When you find your own unique answer to the question of why you’re here,

you will feel it resonate with you deeply. The words will seem to have a special energy to you,and you will feel that energy whenever you read them. Discovering your purpose is the easy part. The hard part is keeping it with you on a daily basis and working on yourself to the point where you become that purpose. If you’re inclined to ask why this little process works,

just put that question aside until after you’ve successfully completed it. Once you’ve done that,you’ll probably have your own answer to why it works. Most likely if you ask 10 different people why this works (people who’ve successfully completed it),

you’ll get 10 different answers,all filtered through their individual belief systems,and each will contain its own reflection of truth. Obviously,

this process won’t work if you quit before convergence. I’d guesstimate that 80-90% of people should achieve convergence in less than an hour. If you’re really entrenched in your beliefs and resistant to the process,

maybe it will take you 5 sessions and 3 hours,but I suspect that such people will simply quit early (like within the first 15 minutes) or won’t even attempt it at all. But if you’re drawn to read this blog (and haven’t been inclined to ban it from your life yet),

then it’s doubtful you fall into this group. Give it a shot!At the very least, you’ll learn one of two things:your true purpose in life -or- that you should unsubscribe from this blog. 😉 Update 8/8/06:

Be sure to read the follow-up to this article,especially if you’re having trouble with this particular approach (there’s an alternative method you can use):

The Meaning of Life:Discover Your Purpose. https://stevepavlina.com/blog/2005/01/how-to-discover-your-life-purpose-in-about-20-minutes/